Crimson Affections
by Windswept Blossoms
Summary: The Thunder Beast reflects on the past, present and future of loving his dawn-haired princess. HakxYona.


**WARNING: Contains a few spoilers from the manga. Proceed at your own risk.**

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Hak denied it enthusiastically every time the subject was brought up, but deep down he knew that '_Droopy Eyes_' had never made what he often dismissed as a baseless assumption. Jae Ha had always been right. He was utterly, completely and helplessly in love with his princess Yona.

Although, there was one part about Jae Ha's theory that was wrong. Hak hadn't started having feelings for her only after a pinch of Fate and many undesirable circumstances had thrown them out of the castle. It wasn't a product of being forced to spend time together: that was an absolute insult. The roots of his affections went back so far neither an expert like Jae Ha nor a genius like Yun would be able to figure out. They were from a time when they were still wild, young and carefree innocents living behind sheltered walls.

He remembered the first time he had noticed her, when Mun Deok brought him on his maiden visit to Hiryuu castle. Like anyone else, it was her hair that had seized his attention and refused to let go. In the long-winded history of Kouka, there had only been one person with red hair and that had been none other than King Hiryuu. Therefore, seeing this girl who was slightly younger than him prancing around with a head of flaming crimson tresses had shocked the living daylights out of him. Yona must have felt him staring at that time, because she had turned around. That precious pair of lavender irises, which he would later come to know could sparkle like gemstones or dim like the light of a dying candle in accordance with her emotions, could not vanish from behind his eyelids for a long while even though he had only glanced briefly at them once.

Somehow, he was able to squeeze into Soo Won and Yona's tight friendship and become one of them during the visits he made to the castle.. He wasn't going to forget that Soo Won had been one of the greatest friends that a humble adopted orphan from the Wind Tribe could ever ask for. But the main point here was Yona. wasn't it?

When he first met her, Yona had been a spoiled brat who screamed at seeing creepy crawlies and cried every time she so much as scratched herself. Hak had even thought, "_When I grow up I'm never marrying a girl like the Princess_." But alas Fate had made a fool of him and he played right into the cruel game of love. Throughout the years, her special place in his heart grew bigger and bigger with each passing day. He remembered all those times he had worried for her- when she felt lonely because King Il didn't have time to spend with her, when she fell ill, when she got lost in Kuuto's marketplace, every last bit. She was always, always, always on his mind. Maybe that was the reason Yona had always been sneezing.

But while the rising Thunder Beast had been slowly and steadily falling for the red-haired princess, the latter's heart already belonged to her cousin. Ironically, Hak only realized that he was in love with Yona at the moment when she admitted to him that she liked Soo Won, because what else could that crushing and terrible pain that had swelled up in his chest at that time been, if it was not heartbreak? Even if he had figured out what those weird fluttery feelings that had danced around in his chest for years whenever he saw Yona, it was all too late.

At that moment, Hak knew he was a goner. He didn't have it in him to snatch her heart back. How could he, when one was the girl he loved and the other was his best friend? Contrary to what the silly gossips said, he wasn't heartless and entirely composed of all brawn and no brains. He knew that if he tried to pursue Yona, their friendship would suffer for it. So he shut those feelings away and prepared to wish those two happiness when the day came.

But Soo Won's shocking betrayal came first. The day was still fresh in his mind. Hak still didn't completely understand how King Il had died and sometimes he regretted not being able to pay his final respects to a man he had respected so much, but given the circumstances, the best way of honouring King Il would have been to fulfil his promise before anything else. That night, he threw away everything he ever had, for the sake of saving one girl. Even if he hadn't been her personal bodyguard, even if he hadn't been tied down to a vow he made three years ago, he would have abandoned it all just to keep Yona alive. That was love, wasn't it?

After they left the castle, there had been a few times when Hak had thought that he would finally stand a chance. Specifically, it was always when Yona said something about needing him.

"Give yourself to me, Hak!" That happened when she was begging him to leave the Wind Tribe together.

"I won't go anywhere without Hak." That was from when she had interrupted the bickering between him and Ki Ja.

"Hak, I'm leaving tomorrow. Come with me." That was after they had won the battle in Awa.

He was a fool to have been mislead.. From the way Yona still kept the hairpin that was Soo Won's birthday present to her close by her side, from the way she would stare off into space whenever Yun or one of the dragons made a passing comment that reminded her of Soo Won, from the way she had doubled over and cried her heart out when she bumped into him in Awa, it should have been obvious that she still couldn't let go of her cousin.

Time passes and the seasons change. Some day, the struggle against Soo Won would end. Some day, they would return to the castle, Yona would take her rightful place on her throne and he would become the General of the Wind Tribe again. When things were peaceful again, he could consider mentioning his feelings to her.

She would not accept them, but it wouldn't matter. Come what may, Hak would still serve her, protect her, love her and never betray her. Hell, he would give up his life for Yona, as he had already almost accomplished more than a few times before. If he was already prepared to sacrifice so much, what was a little bit of happiness to him? As long as Yona could be happy, as long as she continued to smile, it would be enough for him.

"- by the way… Hak?" Someone tugged on his sleeve. The ex-general blinked and found himself surrounded by one of the forests of Water Tribe territory, a pile of logs in his arms. He almost tripped over a stray tree root in his surprise when he found himself standing there with Yona staring up at him. Hadn't he been in Hiryuu castle? "You were spacing out. What's wrong?"

Ah, that's right. They had been collecting wood for the fire. The castle resided in his imagination. Hak shook his head. How had one little journey to fetch some kindle sent him on a long trip down memory lane? "It's nothing."

"Are you sure?" It was only then that he realized Yona's voice had changed over the course of time. It was less whiny and exuded more maturity than the echoes ringing in his memory. Hak liked the way she pronounced his name with a soft '-ku' at the end that resulted from her Sky Tribe accent. He turned to her and immediately felt a shiver run down his spine. She was making that face again- looking straight, eyebrows raised, eyes round and lips stretched in an awkward smile.

That face meant trouble for him 100% of the time.

That face involved Jae Ha and his inability to shut his stupid trap 99% of the time.

"Jae Ha said something weird about you earlier. He said that-"

"Hime-san." Hak cut in before he heard something he didn't want to know or answer. "It'll be good for you to learn to start ignoring him."

"But Jae Ha said that I should pay closer attention to your feelings. Is there something bothering you?" The red-haired princess asked. She turned to meet Hak's gaze. He was immediately enraptured by her eyes. There was always something about those deep pools of liquid amethyst that seemed to enchant and lure you in. For a good while, Hak allowed himself to drown in their captivating beauty. "You always look sad. Are you longing for someone? Do you want to see Mun Deok?"

_**Of course **_he was longing for Mun Deok. Hak pulled his features back into a look of nonchalance. "Like hell I'm miss that old geezer." He grumbled, slightly in annoyance, mostly in despair.

"That's good to hear." Yona smiled, the radiance reminding the ex-general of the sun. "But if anything is bothering you, please tell me, okay?" Her voice had turned into a whisper and- was he imagining it?- her face was slightly red. "I'll feel sad if you're sad too. I want the both of us to be happy together."

Happy… _together_?

Hak had difficulty trying to comprehend the words. He owed Yona a reply, but he was too stunned to even make a sound.

"Welcome back!" Zeno yelled happily, his voice pulling Hak away from his thoughts. They had already arrived back at the campsite. It might have been just him, but Yun seemed to pop up from nowhere as he took the logs from their hands. Yona ran off with the younger male to help him prepare dinner and Hak was left standing alone, still thinking about what she said, watching her red curls bounce about as she helped. They caught the last rays of the setting sun and seemed to shine around her head like a halo. She looked like an angel. His angel.

"Yo, Hak-"

Before Jae Ha had the time to react, Hak had pulled out his beloved Hsu Quandao from nowhere, swinging it with the intention to kill.. Unfortunately, the Green Dragon was no idiot and managed to conveniently kick the blow aside with his leg. Damn Jae Ha and his stupid fairy powers. "Meddling in the lives of other isn't a virtue, big brother." Hak growled, shooting the other man a glare that could melt snow. "Careful you don't make me rip your mouth off one day."

"Big brother is just helping, my dear Hak." Jae Ha smirked at him, but the edge of seriousness in his tone did not go unnoticed by the latter's sharp ears. "Or I'll take her if you don't."

Hak raised his weapon again. Jae Ha barely rolled out of the way as the blade stuck itself into the ground where his right leg had been only a second ago.

"Don't let me catch you, pervy droopy eyes, or I'll mince you up and feed you to the Blue Dragon's squirrel."

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**A/N: So I recently caught up with the manga of Akatsuki no Yona. As you can already tell, I ship HakxYona. (Soo Won would come in second, but that's not my point.) This whole fic is basically my raging about the lack of HakxYona in the 92 chapters I've read so far. Every time, EVERY TIME Hak almost gets to confessing his feelings (and I start squealing), it's either he stops himself, or Yona stops him, or some other completely unrelated third party stops him (thereby crushing my fangirl heart). And how does Yona never realize it? It's so frustrating!  
**

**Anyway, yeah. I tried to keep this anime-friendly as far as possible, for those who haven't read the manga. In fact I think there was only one insignificant sentence that mentions something that wasn't seen in the anime. The last part is also based on a scene from chapter 62, but it hardly gives anything away.**

**That's enough rambling from me, I hope you enjoyed it! Feel free to tell me your thoughts or anything! Have a nice day :D**

**P.S. I'm sorry, Shin Ah and Ki Ja. I couldn't find anywhere to fit you in T_T.**


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